And Then I Had to Break Up With Him...In My Head

As I have said before, some of my best love affairs are in my head. So, I "met" a guy. OK, you got me, we never actually met in real life, but we talked and we talked and we had a "connection".

He was in a different city (still is) and shortly after the "connection" was formed, there was trouble in cyber paradise. HE started to panic about having feelings for me, since I live 4ish hours away (by car).

Please let me point out, that very early on, he was concerned about the issue of me living four hours away, not that he lived four hours away just me living four hours away. He, also really wasn't looking for a long distance relationship, nor was I, actually I'm not sure what I was looking for, but I enjoyed talking with him. Anyway, after an intense week of communication, clearly a bond was formed. What can I say, I have that affect on people.

Anyway, of course, our one week cyber relationship only got stronger and stronger, we even had a facetime date, it was getting serious, and then all of a sudden, BAM, I could feel a shift, he was pulling away.

So, after a strange couple of days and many less phone calls and text messages, it was time to see what the fuck was going on. At that exact moment, I knew our one and a half week love affair was only going downhill and  I would mentally have to break up with all 5'6" of him, in my head. It was a sad week, but it had to be done. And for someone who claimed to be a communicator, there was little communicating. I was hormonal and thrown off, so from a little help from a much softer friend, we compiled a text.

I will spare you the not so dirty details, because there was a ton of back and forth with very foul language (in a nice way, it's just how we communicated with one another), but basically I asked why I hadn't heard from his whore mouth (yes, that was how we spoke to each other). He essentially said that he was getting attached (I guess to me) and since I live so far away (once again, it's my fault) and he is lonely sometimes (who isn't?!), so he is dealing with it (his feelings?) in his way. So, I calmly advised him to get the sand out of the vagina, man up and communicate. I also condoned him doing what he needs, sounded like he wanted to continue to date in his neck of the woods and keep me around, just in case, I don't blame him, why not keep me around, I'm pretty fun, especially when things are light and we talked so well. But, as they say all good things come to an end and it did. Whomever came up with that saying is stupid, I don't see why all good things have to come to an end, it is very pessimistic, I say, keep that love alive and try a little fucking harder, people can be so lazy.

When I think about, it still makes me a little sad, I even hang my head down a little. I think I am mourning our quick cyber love affair. I also think it is for the best. And at least I never, ever have to worry about running into him ever, because even if I did, I probably wouldn't know it was him. Except that he is a small part asian covered in tattoos, but apparently in his parts, that's not so hard to find.




Rest in peace little man (no he is not dead! Just kind of dead to me only because we haven't talked). I will always have fond memories of what was had and what could have been.